Fork in the road
So you’re a little confused about where you’re going and what you’re supposed to be doing with your life. My friend I understand exactly how you feel because I too have been there before. As someone who struggled for years with indecisiveness when it came to picking a career, I understand what you might be feeling right now. Don’t worry because you’re going to figure it out.
Just relax
A quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson goes “Patience and fortitude conquer all things.” Man I like that quote. It simplifies things. Emerson is right - there is no other way to figure out where you belong than to make time to try out different careers and give yourself space to grow, give yourself time to be fail and then pick up again. If you think you have to get it right the first time, you won’t have the space really to investigate, and you’ll convince yourself that something is right when it’s not. Later you’ll have a quarter life crises when you realize that you lied to yourself so you could feel stable instead of investigating.
Find your passion first
When I graduated from college, I hit the ground running thinking motion picture production was the only place in the world for me. But then I hit a brick wall and realized that I never really had a passion for it in the first place. It was easy for me to become discouraged and bail out when the times became tough. I was shocked to find out that I’d just spent 4 years getting an education in something I cared nothing about. I found other jobs but they too were a disappointment. Everything was some version of creating a new filing system for someone who is important.
In hindsight all of this was a blessing in disguise. It was a blessing because it allowed me time to find myself. It allowed me time to learn about my weaknesses and discover my strengths. See it doesn’t matter whether we’re in the middle class crunch or the ultra rich elite, at some point we all get confused about what choice to make next. Here in lies the silver lining in that dark cloud. The silver lining is that chaos and confusion in our lives often leads to personal enlightenment when we stop for a moment and examine what’s going on in the situation. It’s during our trying and most difficult times that we find our most creative solutions.
Trials And Tribulations
After I lost my way in film I tumbled through life, going from job to job, hobby to hobby. I dove into swimming with thoughts of becoming a life guard. I studied Microsoft Excel to improve my data entry ability with spread sheets and even learned to dance salsa so I could teach a beginner’s class at the local club near my house. I saw it as an opportunity to become entrepreneurial and share what I’d learned with the shy people yearning to dance and mingle with the regulars. Working directly with people felt good to me.
I was learning about myself while discovering new ways to make money at the same time. I even worked for a traveling circus called Cavalia at one point, selling water during intermission to the fans. The pay was terrible. I was earning 8 bucks an hour. Imagine earning 8 bucks an hour and living in California where milk alone is 4 dollars a gallon. Still this was a great job for me because I discovered how much I enjoyed working live events.
I slaved through odd jobs in call centers and realized I hated with a passion being chained behind a desk for 8 hours a day doing data entry. But then enlightenment hit me while working for a school that taught foreign languages. My job was to preset meetings with company directors and talk with them about how their employees could benefit from learning a foreign language.
It was there I realized public speaking came naturally and going out to meet new people and presenting an idea to them was right up my alley. I was good at corporate sales. But the drawback was, even though the job was great I disliked working on commission. I couldn’t afford to wait 3, sometimes 4 weeks before a sale closed to receive a paycheck.
So I moved on and took an internship at a big advertising/public relations firm and it was there I fell in love. Again the pay was low in the beginning, but I loved the work so it really didn’t matter. I was happy and willing to make sacrifices to do something I loved. It was thrilling to be able to network with the media. I enjoyed moving about town, going to events, speaking to journalists and helping to shape public opinion about a client my firm represented. It was exactly the sort of career I’d been searching for.
It had been a long journey with lots of experimenting and sacrifices along the way. Sometimes I couldn’t pay rent, especially while working at Cavalia and those call centers. More than once my landlord wanted to evict me. But those experiences were necessary growing pains and sacrifices needed in order to get down to the nitty gritty of knowing my true passion. Now after all those years of confusion I’d found a field of work that I enjoyed and could do easily. Going to work was fun. It didn’t even feel like work. I’d found something that I loved and had a passion for and all it took was a little bit of patience and fortitude, just like Ralph Waldo Emerson said it would.
An Odd Way To Discover Hidden Skills
My friend Karen, a successful marketing executive in Chicago, spent years on the beaches of California bumming around playing volleyball. Ironically it was through volleyball that she was able to bounce her way over to Ketchum marketing and public relations.
Sick of the 9 to 5 grind as an office worker, Karen, who always had a zest for life; set out to find a job she could be passionate about. Always creative, Karen wanted to do something where she could stretch her imagination. So she went from job to job, interview after interview yet nothing captured her attention long enough to stick.
Karen was at wits end. So instead of settling and forcing herself into a dead end career she’d hate, Karen took sometime off and followed her true passion, sports. She knew that if she could do anything in the world at that moment in time it’d be playing volleyball on the beach. So Karen decided to follow her passion.
She kept an odd job but ultimately set out to pursue what made her happy. After a few years of playing amateur volleyball, she finally made the Southern California professional team. She’d work very hard to get chosen for the tour and now her dream had come true. She practiced 8 hours a day on the beach and did Budweiser commercials to help with the bills. It was fun in the beginning.
But as Karen continued to play, she no doubt enjoyed herself but soon began to realize she wasn’t nearly as competitive as some of the top players were. Some of the women were risking injury, willing to break a leg in order to achieve top rank. Rank didn’t matter as much to Karen. She was satisfied with just having fun as opposed to landing the number one spot. Something she didn’t know about herself.
However, though she may not have excelled at rushing the net, Karen noticed that winning sponsors was a skill that came easily for her, and that was very important because in essence gaining sponsorship is what professional sports is really all about. In fact the sponsors she attracted were better than the ones attracted by women who ranked higher than her. By attracting top sponsors she also won the attention of partners and trainers who wanted to be affiliated with them.
She took a moment to reflect on his. The truth about professional volleyball was that, even though she really loved the game, life as a professional player was dirt tough. The early excitement of playing all day long began to fade like the evening sun. In her moment of reflection Karen questioned how she could use her skills to make money. The answer came to her in the form of marketing.
After an internship to build a resume and some courses at UCLA to gain more insight into the field, Karen joined a big marketing and public relations firm in Chicago. It was there she began climbing the corporate ladder of success.
More Crunch To Munch On: Sometimes, It Takes A Little Courage...
Just as I, Karen found career success because she wasn’t afraid to fail. She didn’t follow the yellow brick road to success. Her approach was non-traditional yet reasonable because in reality, as long as it’s legal, there is no right or wrong path to success. Karen tried everything until something worked. She got her feet wet in multiple careers but ultimately allowed her true passion to guide her.
So remember: never be afraid to lose yourself, at least temporarily. It’s ok to break with tradition sometimes and go a little crazy because confusion can lead to enlightenment. When you don’t know what to do, be brave and try anything and everything. You’ll become a stronger person in the process and discover your gift all at once.
